Put A Case On That Phone Girrrrl

Everyone has an iPhone. At least that’s what I tell myself because I’m an Apple person and don’t believe in Android devices, so in my brain I think that everyone in the world has an iPhone. So that is what I’m basing this post on. If you don’t have an iPhone, well, I’m sorry. But really, I’m not sorry. Your Android commercials make me mad because sometimes they make me think that they’re better than an iPhone, but then I come to my senses and realize that they’re not. They’re just not. Apple rules all, and that’s what I know.

I’m one of those people you hate because I continually drop my phone and have yet to have a screen break. I know that by typing these words I’m jinxing myself. But I’m even surprised myself that it’s never happened. I guess it’s a waiting game now. But, you can in fact help yourself avoid the cracked screen of death by using a case. Some people aren’t fans of using cases because they’re bulky, or they cover up the beauty that is an iPhone. I’m a big believer in cases, sans Otterbox because those are just unnecessarily bulky and in my opinion, absurd. But there is a site that you may or may not have heard of called Society6, it has some of the best iPhone cases on the market, and they’re all $35. I guarantee you, whatever your style is, they’ll have one that you love. If I had a million doll hairs, I’d buy up half of them and change them everyday. I firmly believe that your phone case is an accessory. Here’s a simile that I just came up with, pretend you’re back in junior high language arts. Phone cases are to phones as eyebrows are to faces. I actually don’t even think that’s a simile, but just go withit. All you have to know is that they’re THAT important. If you don’t believe that your eyebrows are important, we need to chat, but that’s a post for another day. In the meantime, I’ve picked out some of my favorite cases from Society6. Take a look, I promise you’ll find one that you love!

Rainy Day Roundup

Happy Monday! Hope everyone’s weekend was as relaxing as mine. I got to hang out with the boyfriend, spend time with the extended family, work on blog stuff, and attend a baby shower/blackhawks viewing party. I’d chalk that up to a pretty good weekend.

I also took the plunge and chopped off my locks. I’d been debating this for awhile but was really nervous because I loved my long hair. But it was definitely something that needed to be done. While I’m fine with spending money on some things, getting my hair cut is not one of those things. It’s just so hard for me to justify spending $40 for someone to trim a half inch of hair every 6 weeks. I can’t and I won’t. Which is how my ends get to the point of looking like they’ve been fried and then deep fried. In other words, they were not pretty, or healthy. Pretty sure my stylist was appalled, but pretending not to be. Thanks Hannah!  Luckily she did a great job though and I’m really happy with how it turned out. I also splurged on a Keratin treatment because it was on sale, so now my hair is smooth as a baby’s bottom, though I haven’t really been around too many baby bottoms so I can’t actually verify that as fact. Please enjoy this awkwardly serious selfie.



Anywho, it seems like we’re finally out of those terribly awful woods that I like to call: winter. But as soon as the cold seemed to disappear, the rain has taken its place. The outlook for the week in Chicago is rain, rain, rain, rain, rain. Cool. Reeeeal cool. Not. Can we just have some normal, NICE weather? Is that too much to ask? Until then, let’s make sure that you’re still lookin’ cute even when it’s the exact opposite of cute outside. Check out some of my favorite rainy day gear in the roundup below.

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Weekend Links | 4.25.14

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Happy Friday my little blogglings! I hope every ones week flew by. Somehow Friday managed to get here pretty quickly, despite the nightmares I had Sunday night about how miserable the week would be after our little getaway to Nashville (which was amazing by the way, post on that soon!) It’s funny how you take days off for a relaxing vacation and then when you get back it’s almost like you need another day to get your mind right, which is crazy because all you did the whole time was kick back and chill. Life’s weird right?

In other news, this weekend I will be attending my first baby shower. And there will be boys there. And a keg. Don’t be jealous. Mama G is really setting the bar high since she’s one of the first to pop one out, everyone else is going to have to hire magicians and rent chocolate fountains to compete. The rest of us are screwed. It’s a real problem when the first one to do everything is really good at doing said things. She got married first too and her wedding was really good, damn her! 

Hope you all have a great weekend while I’m enjoying generic baby shower games. That’s a dirty lie, I’ll be getting Sunday day drunk at a baby shower and yelling at the Blackhawks through the tv. I dare you to come up with something more fun than that! Anyway, here are you links!

Andy Warhol’s #TBT was better than your was. That should be obvious though.

Speaking of dead technology, watch this hilarious video of kids trying to understand a Walkman.

As a follow up to my obsession with my best friend Emma Watson, more reasons to love her

Stop spending money on alcohol. No, keep spending it, just read this first

In case you missed it, Time’s 2014 Most Influential People. Yay Miley! Continue rolling your eyes.

Tory Birch is having their Friends & Family sale right now, 25% off. If anyone wants to get me these, I’m an 8.5 and can pay you back in guacamole.

And since we’re on the subject of food, here’s a fun restaurant guide for every el stop. Can we talk about how they call it the L instead of El? It’s El folks, short for elevated. Get it right!

I love a good list. But this one is like, really good. It’s comparing teen girls mid 2000s to teen girls now. Like I did, you’ll likely cry for an hour after you read it because you’ll realize that a. you’re not cool anymore and b. you’re old. 

To perk you up after that life ruining list up there, here’s a cover of fleetwood mac’s dreams. with a cameo from a one blaire waldorf. (i think i’m going to cut my hair like ms. meester’s, thoughts?)

Everyone please look at this slide show from Coachella. And then tell me if i’m too far off base here when I say, I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. This is what fashion is nowadays? Really? Because I don’t get it. Nor do I like it.

Pinaholic? Good, me too. (Sometimes I do that when I’m on the toilet too!) Fun fact, 75% of Pinterest users are pinning from mobile. Fun stat huh? So check out their new Guided Search for the mobile app. Some people are just so smart it makes me sick.

Last but not least, if you’ve ever wanted to time travel, now you can. Sort of. And all thanks to who? You guessed it, The Googs. That damn Google machine, what will it come up with next?

L

My Top 10 Dumbest Instagram Decisions

There are times that I’m sitting on the toilet in the morning flipping through my own Instagrams because I’m not awake enough yet to process actual information, but not asleep enough to not need to entertain myself. As I flip through I always see a couple that I wonder to myself – Wait, did I really post this? Was I drunk? Musta been drunk. Hold on though, I’d never be drunk at work, apparently I was sober. That’s embarrassing. I should delete it. Then I continue to work through an internal struggle with myself about “standing by my work”. Whatever. But the inability to delete means they’re still out there for the world to see, so I may as well let you all take a gander at the ones I think are my dumbest instagram decisions to date. This post will most definitely be revisited down the road. So without further ado, I present to you my Top 10 Dumbest Instagram Decisions.

This picture actually makes me sad. It seriously looks miserable. There is nothing in the stockings. You can’t see what they’re hanging from because I cropped it worse than a three year old. There isn’t even a fire in the fireplace! The filter I chose is shit. Basically this is all around the worst Christmas picture ever. And to make matters worse, my mother decided to comment “N O P”. I had to text her to find out what this foreign acronym that I’d never heard of meant. Turns out N O P was in fact not an acronym, but the letters following the L and M embroidered on the stockings. “Get it? LMNOP?” No mom, I clearly did not get it.

I don’t know how this got nine likes. I don’t know how it got any likes to be honest. The only thing that is right about this is that someone called me out hard with some brutal honesty and a hashtag. And someone else called me a weirdo. Then again, his name is Guido, so who is the weirdo now? I know, still me, womp womp.

This is a dumb picture. That’s quite obvious. There is nothing written on the envelope, there’s a laptop being controlled by an arm attached to no one (it’s actually attached to the bride, but since I’m a bitch and didn’t tag her, no one will ever know!)  And there’s a hole punch. What about this did I think would be intriguing? Because I see nothing. Then again, I do see an alcoholic beverage hidden in the upper right corner, so now it’s starting to make a little more sense.



This would have been an acceptable post about seven years ago, when I was 19 and underage drinking on the train was cool. But unfortunately this was posted 54 weeks ago. Age 25. How sad. Granted, I was posting it to show off my nails not having polish on them (as if THAT’S a good reason to post?) because that never happens, but honestly, who gives a hoot about that? No one. What makes this train wreck even harder to look at is two fold. One, it’s a Miller Lite tallboy. And two, I hashtagged it with #latergram. Which means that I took the picture and then decided LATER to post it on Instagram. So basically, I was flipping through pictures and thought, wow, this picture is TOO cool, I should make sure to get it into social media land for everyone to see, I think they’d really like it. Not.


Yes, they still exist Lauren, you wouldn’t be taking a picture of it if it didn’t. Don’t be so stupid! The lighting and/or filter usage makes me feel like I was outside a strip mall in 1998. Total bummer that I took this too long ago to be able to tag a location, so who knows where I was…a dive bar? A bowling alley? Like, where are payphones still located? Is there a payphone removal service? Where did they all go? I have so many questions. Excuse me while I go GTS (google that shit).



So I had my work friend take this picture when I read about Baby Mugging. If you don’t know what it is, please educate and enjoy yourself here. Problem is, I did not do a good job of mugging. Or rather, my photographer did not capture me to the best of his ability. I don’t blame him, I blame myself for still posting it when clearly my whole body does not look like it’s inside the mug! Like, I can see the chair handle. Which means so can everyone else. Additionally, my hair is flatter than my chest was until about my freshman year of college. To the 21 of you that liked it anyway, bless your hearts.


While writing this post I’m really starting to see that I need to chill out on the inanimate object shots, or the ones that suck at least. Honestly, why did I think posting how much tupperware I’ve collected at my desk would be Instagram worthy? It basically makes me look like I’m an overeater. A sloppy human. And…a hoarder. Unfortunately for all you interested men reading the blog, I’m off the market.  At least the pictures in the background prove I have friends…?



I think that the chemicals in the dye mixed with the heat in that helmet like contraption created a brain-frying combination at the exact time I posted this picture. And the sad part is, that probably isn’t even true because this is the second in a two part series. The first is a mirror pic taken ten minutes before this beauty. You’d think one is more than enough. but clearly I needed to make sure you were aware that I was STILL getting my hair colored…ten minutes later. Also, what is that filter? It is terrible, along with the face I’m making. This is what we call an all around fail. Thankfully my hair did not end up the same way.

I’m all for the artsty posts of random objects if you do it right. I tend to post these a lot, as seen above. But majority of the times I compose them in a way that they’re actually appealing. This is not one of those cases, nor are any of the above examples. Why did I take this? And more importantly, why did I post it? It’s a picture of doorknobs. With price tags. At what looks to be Menard’s. Bad angle. Bad light. Bad filter. Bad everything. And to add insult to injury, I used tilt shift on it. Woof.


This one might take the cake. A classic case of “I Haven’t Insta’d in Awhile, Better Not Miss My Weekly Quota”. I’m seriously laughing out loud at how absurd this photo is. The caption is terrible too. You’d think if I’m going to post such a bad photo I’d make sure the caption was decent to at least bring something to the table. No such luck. We won’t even bring up the fact that the entire right half of the picture is too dark to even make anything out. Good. Night.

L

Gallery Wall Inspo

I’ve been in my new apartment since September and really haven’t done much in terms of decorating. But over the past few months I’ve really been itching to prettyify this place. I’m actually really lucky because I have a ton of closet space in this lil ol’ one bedroom. But this also means that there isn’t a ton of wall space, especially with a big bay window and a fire place. But ther IS one big empty space right above my TV. And I’m pretty sure it’s calling for me to create a gallery wall around it. And I’m pretty sure it’s right. 

So I’ve decided that this will be my new project. I’m doing it. I’ve already got a couple pieces that I know I want to use like a big canvas of the Chicago skyline that I took while Max and I were sailing on the lake two summers ago. I also have a couple smaller ones that I created myself with cute quotes. I ordered these adorable guys from Etsy a few weeks ago that I think will fit just perfectly. Because you who doesn’t love zoo animals eating noodles? No one, that’s who. I think I’m going to spend a weekend thrifting (which I’ve actually never done – two birds, huh?) looking for unique frames, then once I have those I can figure out what exactly will go in them. Is it so wrong to used the framed and signed photo of Oprah that my ex-roomie left behind two years ago? The answer to that, is yes, yes it is. Which means, Katie, you can have your picture back, I’m sure Ms. Winfrey is just dying to get up on a wall in the nursery and watch over the sweet baby that will be here soon. #creepy

I’ve found some great inspiration that I thought would be worth sharing. I really love the ones that aren’t just photographs. I think it just makes for more of a conversation piece.  If you have any tips or suggestions on creating a gallery wall, please let me know in the comments. 

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